she loves you

this is for you, yes YOU.

she is unconditionally and irrevocably in love with you. and she doesn't know why. she can't sleep tonight, thinking about you. she misses you. and she is waiting loyally by her handphone, bringing it everywhere like a talisman, for a simple text message from you. just a simple text message's all she asked for, although it now seems vaguely impossible.

she loves getting a text from you. you dont know this, but she will smile so wide her dimple on her right cheek shows when your name appeared on the phone screen. she grins happily, giggling cheekily, because that text message tells her that you do remember her. that maybe you miss her. her heart will also beat wildly. you're her adrenaline. endorphine.  she will blush, eyes bigger, and smile. she'll think that she looks pretty around you. and i tell you what, when a girl thinks so, she loves you.

she loves talking to you , too. you make her laugh a lot. you think her laughters are sexy--and she couldnt feel more flattered about that. she wants to talk to you when things go wrong, when a relative is sick or when a best friend is leaving her. she wants you to make her feel better. she knows you can make her feel better, who else but the one she loves? she wants you to make her feel better and tell her, "oh schu, all is well dont worry".

and her joy! she shares them with you. she wants to tell you how she passed with flyin colours. and how she hijacked her aunt's peugeot and drove it along the beach. she wants to tell you her new favourite song, or band. she wants you to have a bit of her happiness because, well she loves you. isnt that obvious? she is friggin in love with YOU. MADLY.

and today.  tonight, she is lying on her bed, in tears because she misses you. because she needs you. because she is reminiscing all the good time she had with you, all the laughter, all the smiles, all the jokes,all the bliss, all the love.

she is sobbing, cant sleep, most importantly because she is in love with you.

and she picks up the phone. she wants to dail your number. it 4 am in the morning, and because she loves you so much she knows you're asleep. she is torn. she is dying, dying of lovesick. dying to tell you she loves you. she misses you. she could do anything to hear you calling her name again. but she puts the phone back.

she cant. she cant tell you that now. not at 4am in the morning. not even tomorrow, or ever. she cant tell you how much she loves you, how much she yearns to hear your voice again--when was the last time? she cant disturb you. not now. not ever.

because she loves you, and she doesnt want you to go away. further. than her.

and whatever she does she always forget to forget you