if Love was a person

ok so the title is kinda er er er..lovey dovey but heck I am not ya.

If Love was a person, how do you think he or she would be like? maybe, he(or she, whatever tickles your fancy) likes to eat sandwiches. Maybe he goes to gigs. Maybe he likes talking on the phone, or not, maybe he's a texting kinda guy, maybe he texts you like 5 times a day telling you his class was cancelled or asking you what you're having for dinner.

Maybe he'll call you after days of you going silence. Maybe he sleeps late at night. Maybe he sleeps early and hates it when you won't let him to.  He could be good looking, this, really hot guy who looks like Edward Cullen or Jacob Black (whichever team u're in), breaking hearts and faces. Maybe he's just a not-so-tall-almost-the-same-height-with-you-guy whom you hooked up with cuz you were sure he won't cheat on you (mommi says pain in the eyes, but not the heart).

A total recluse,shows no mercy and only cares about himself, maybe he's a rockstar with drug problems.  Maybe he smokes and tells you that he doesn't cuz you're asthmatic. Or maybe LOVE is a hip hop guy who wears baggy pants and goes clubbing like all the time and swears a lot. Or maybe he's the total opposite. He could be as cute and lovely and sweet as the dork who sits next to you in Lecture Hall.  Maybe Love is a dork! and nothing more! Sweet. Always nice to you. Who tells you that everything's gonna be okay. Calls you when you breakdown and makes me smile cuz he reads in your facebook status that that's what you want. Always make you giggle and giggle again. Hey that aint a dork after all, that's LOVE. Maybe you were wrong. Maybe he's NOT Love.

I've known Love since i was 8. I had just moved in to the new school, new environment, feeling like Bella Swan and then it was like first grade all over again and I was the shiny new toy. Love was a classmate who was colour blind, this Chinese boy like the one in Arwah Yasmin Ahmad's ad, the one that says ILY to a Malay gal, THAT ONE! He talks a lot and jokes a lot, and I felt bad at the thought of not seeing him for even a day. And I wouldn't even skip class. And at every class when I saw him I had this feeling I didn't know how to explain then but I know that I LIKE THAT FEELING.  Love waved me goodbye one day, he was on the bike with his dad, and frowned and pout when I didn't waved back. Yeah. That's the fondest memory i had of Love.

Fast forward. I was 18, I left school and went to a college. It was difficult, the studying and coping with lots of people. I was different, and Love saw that and liked that. Love was a dork. Initially. He was really nice to me. He'd cross the wide blue sea- via the bridge heck- just to see me. He'd bring me to the beach on dates- he knew I love beaches. He helped me get rid off the sand in my pairs of ballerina flatts while me babbling at him- "I DUNNO U WERE TAKING ME HERE"- 

well well tears on me eyes already WHY am i reminiscing time when he dumped me for another girl. Love said that love to me was gone. Love said that he was sick of me. Love said that I was too good and pretty for him (YOU JERK, go fcuk urself) and Love made me cry and grew really pale for weeks and later Love made me die and became a vampire. Love was mean to me at one point that I thought maybe I should stop looking for Love.

Then, shortly after that,one lead me to believe that everything was beautiful at first. He made me say imy and he made me go all mushy2 around him- and sometimes he'd go mushy2 with me too...the so called "manja" that makes u go "awwwwwwwwwwwwww that's cute."

 He made me smile and giggle and couldn't sleep all night and dream and create names for our children (ok like I DID NOT do that) and then I found out he was just being nice AND that HE WAS JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU and then you learn something new. OMG THERE IS A POSSIBILITY THAT EVERYTHING YOU KNEW WAS JUST A LIE. You could be Truman of the Truman Show. But heck it was fun while it lasted ain't it?

Love can be a psycho,5 minute short film involving chainsaws with ok-looking actors with amateurish acting skills. Or this really disturbing human rights violation video you watched on Youtube showing kids getting shot in a war-zone. Short. But it will haunt you forever. Love can be like what Pablo Neruda's poem.Love is Short. But Forgetting is Long.

So how do you think Love would be like if he was just a guy. Maybe he enjoys smoking after meals. And when it rains. Or smokes weed occasionally. Sometimes shisha,which you argued that its' bad for health. Maybe, he shoplifts for fun. Maybe he's a father of 3 kids. Maybe he has 3 girlfriend. Maybe his mom is planning to  hook him up with someone else and being the so-called the good son he said yes and partly because his dad would disown him  if he said no and there goes all the properties he wants and the gal's filthy rich but has a moral issue-she uploaded a pic that shows her cleavage on fb-. haha.

Maybe he's looking for a roommate to share his apartment with. Or maybe he already has a roommate, a really annoying one that disturbs him when he talks to you over the phone- turn out his roommate has feelings for you and he doesn't. Maybe he collects stamps- worse still, Star Wars toys and action figure. Maybe he's a straight fashion designer. Maybe he rides a fixed gear. Maybe he's dating a celebrity. Maybe he's a guy who digs older women. Maybe he's just young and confused and doesn't know what he wants. Maybe he doesn't want to get hurt being in love with someone. Maybe just like you, he wonders what would Love be like if she was just a girl?Maybe he wasn't even LOVE. or Crush, or even LIKE. Maybe just a Fling. Or maybe just a Friend.

ok thanks for reading. This piece has strictly NOTHING to do with anyone. thanks. love love love.

p/s: will you be my love?please....